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Thread: MELL - Suna no Kaze translation

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    Junior Member yuko132 is on a distinguished road yuko132's Avatar
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    Default MELL - Suna no Kaze translation

    Hi! this is my first time posting something in the forum However, I've been working on a translation of this song and here is my first draft. I know that I've Sound songs are complicated to translate because they use a lot of metaphors and are pretty symbolic, but I love MELL so I thought I'd give it a shot

    冷たいガラスに 指先滑らせて
    欠けた月をなぞる
    張り付く涙は 私の血を洗った
    青い鳥凍え落ちるの
    I slide my fingertips along the cold glass
    tracing the moon that is missing
    the sticky tears washed away my blood
    a blue bird freezes and falls over

    時間を止めてあなたに捧げた
    嘘を返して
    人生の続き退屈な夢 そう
    探せないの翼が壊れて
    錆びて亡くした
    終わりのない悲しみが廻る
    I stopped time and gave it to you
    giving you back your lies
    the continuation of this path (life) is a boring dream
    the wings I can't search for break
    and become rusty, so I lost them.
    the endless sadness goes around

    重ねた幻で素肌に赤を描く
    裂けた胸鮮やかに咲く
    I paint red on my bare skin with the illusion that repeats itself
    and my torn chest blooms vividly *

    息を止めてあなたが求めた
    心壊して
    傷跡さえ残らないよう そう
    祈りさえも何も知らない
    雨に流れて
    焼き尽くした砂の風になる
    Holding my breath I longed for you
    to break my heart
    without leaving behind even a scar
    not knowing even how to pray
    I drift in the rain
    and become a scorching sandy wind

    時間を止めてあなたに捧げた
    嘘を返して
    人生の続き退屈な夢 そう
    探せないの翼が壊れて
    錆びて亡くした
    終わりのない悲しみが廻る
    I stopped time and gave it to you
    giving you back your lies
    the continuation of this path (life) is a boring dream
    the wings I can't search for break
    and become rusty, so I lost them.
    the endless sadness goes around

    息を止めてあなたが求めた
    心壊して
    傷跡さえ残らないよう そう
    祈りさえも何も知らない
    雨に流れて
    焼き尽くした砂の風になる
    Holding my breath I longed for you
    to break my heart
    without leaving behind even a scar
    not knowing even how to pray
    I drift in the rain
    and become a scorching sandy wind

    * I really don't understand this line very well... I think it's the singer who is painting using the illusion, but it isn't very clear to me, I'd really appreciate if someone could help me out with this xD

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    Default Re: MELL - Suna no Kaze translation

    >探せないの翼が壊れて
    >錆びて亡くした

    The -te verbs should all take the tense of the last verb in the sequence, and there's also not so much of a cause-and-effect relationship as the current translation implies -- "The wings I can't search for (find?) broke and rusted and I lost them."

    >重ねた幻で素肌に赤を描く
    >裂けた胸鮮やかに咲く

    I think you've made as much sense as can be made of these lines, really. The "blooming vividly" part is probably a poetic reference to her blood, but I'm not sure what to make of the first line.

    >息を止めてあなたが求めた

    Notice that it's あなたが, not あなたを -- it's the "you" who is doing the longing.

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    Default Re: MELL - Suna no Kaze translation

    Thank you so much for your post.

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