Originally Posted by Manhatten_Project_2000
Pirates. Pirates are totally manly. No Ninja could defeat a pirate, because the Pirate would totally just sit there, take it a few hits, and than rip the ninja in two, quite possibly with his pecs, and get on with his full day of raping and pillaging. Ninjas hide like pansies. Also, all their training is lame. They train by sparing, and sitting under waterfalls. Wow. Scared. If I'm a waterfall, ninjas will totally pwn me. Pirates do it right: they train at killing people every day by killing people.
Other Ways in Which Pirates are Better…
Grog– produces immunity to all poisons known to man, because it is made of all poisons known to man, plus 6 that aren’t.
Training– Pirates are well trained in group tactics, allowing ninjas to kill off the redshirts, thus tiring them for when they face the captain/lieutenants.
Lifestyle- Pirates are trained to live off little food and water for long periods of time. Also, pirates tend to be very strong due to the fact they are lifting heavy chests of booty off of merchant vessels all the time. Both of which produce a manly man the likes of which no one has seen.
Charisma- Pirates have more charisma than ninjas. Charismatic people never die, as evidenced by near every speck of fiction I’ve ever ingested.
Gunpowder- Pirates will pwn you if you stand still. Run little ninja, run.
Unwillingness to Stay Dead- Even if you did kill a pirate, chances are he would come back from the dead. Pirates are too awesome to stay dead forever.