I'll forgive you.
Where's mah child support?!
Lol, remember when you tricked me into sitting on your lap by pretending to be santa? I've got a surprise for you!
I'm pregnant! Yay! Bonbons and 20 years of child support and possibly a shotgun wedding!
Also, you should probably get tested for STDs.
Not a good way to make friends dude.
I have my charms, in that H.P. Lovecraft eldritch horror sort of way.
Hey! This beard is fake! You're not Santa at all!
Hey everyone! This Santa is phony!
Who am I to argue with Santa?!
Did you run out of asdfasdfasdf-names?